Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
is it fun? or sober?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize