Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
