question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
