His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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