kristin has been a bad kristin
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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