Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
