Screwed.edu
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
my nose is crying tears of wow.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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