Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Randomize
