I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
