vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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