im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
