Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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