My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize