Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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