Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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