is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
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