No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Houston, we have a squirter
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
