"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
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