listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
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