How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
