To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
