there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
I am full of burrito and curiosity
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Randomize
