I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
