the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
thus making me awesome and them whores
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Randomize