her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
