My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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