I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize