better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
