Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
