Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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