she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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