Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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