yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
