let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize