I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
