If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
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I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
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Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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