I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Operation Purity has been aborted
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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