Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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