I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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