My nipple is on Facebook.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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