How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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