matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
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