I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
