we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
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