Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
