Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
