it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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