Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own