Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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