My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Randomize
