I don't think brook has ever known best
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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